There is the place I think I want to go to—and then when I get there, I dream of being home. There is the place everyone I have loved all my life still is, while I am here. Yet, when I go there, I realize that you really can’t go home again. Or if you do, it is so different that you fall back into the ways of a child. But I go there anyway, and when I return, I long to go back.
Sometimes there is a place I dread being like the doctor’s office, a party where I know no one other than the hostess, the dentist chair to have a root canal, the MRI machine and, in years past, the confessional.
The journey to there isn’t a straight line, in fact it is quite unpredictable, filled with turns and twists and blind hills. Sometimes it feels like driving blindfolded on a mountain road that’s under construction. And yet like so many people before me, I embark on the journey to there willingly, happily even. I look to those around me for inspiration, marveling at how brave they are, how resolute they are to keep going. And I wonder if I am as courageous as they. Then I realize that all this time I had the fortitude to get up every day and keep going, despite the challenges of my life. Why is it that I admire courage in others, but don’t see it in myself?
It would be nice to be Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz and simply follow the yellow brick road—but that, alas, was a fantasy. And I live in an all too real world where love can disappoint, and children are not perfect and friends sometimes betray us, and we hurt even those we love best. And then we realize that the yellow brick road was a scam—after all Oz didn’t give anything to Dorothy that she didn’t already have.
And I know my journey here on earth is not complete, because I’m not there yet.
I embrase you as a friend and writer. You put into words thoughts that we sometimes forget to recognize in our lives. Thanks for touching my life.
I am humbled by these wonderful comments–and in knowing that this blog means something to people, Barb.
Best one yet. Totally loved where you went with this.
Thanks so very much Connie. Sort of a James Joyceian piece–stream of consciousness.
Excellent – you beautifully expressed what we all know so well! Thanks!
My most sincere thanks to you for your comments. I was afraid this piece was too rambling–I am thrilled that so many people commented on it!
Beautifully written and so very true. We all should believe in ourselves and know we are strong!
It does take mamturity to get to that point. So happy that you liked the post, Marsha.
Ok so I heard this before but I still like it. It is poignant and real. We are where we are. We can make the best of being there or make it horrible for everyone else. Never really liked that saying, “if momma ain’t happy then nobody is” although at many times that can be a true statement. Starting today I’m going to bravely accept my ” there”…even if it is the beach! Wish you were here.
Thanks, Chris–wish I was at the beach,too!!
THANK YOU, THANK YOU FOR STATING WHAT I AM FEELING TOO.
Again, Eleanor–I am humbled by the repsonse to this post. It touched many hearts and that is most gratifying. It is so very nice to know that I am not alone, either.
I really like the part about how we admire the courage in others but not ourselves. I enjoyed this piece, Kathy.
Melanie
Thanks, Melanie. The part about admiring courage in others is something that just occured to me recently. I never think of myself as all that brave–but when I look over my life, I realize that I shortchange myself.
Hi Kathy,
Where ever you are reminds me of bits of the Unity Prayer.
“Where ever you are, God is”… and that gives us extra strength.
But I am so happy that on your Journey to There that you are sharing your musings with us.
Love,
Bobbi
Well done Kathy.
Thanks, Paula.
This musing reminds me of a simple but profound statement I wish I had become aware of and applied sooner in my own life…”its not about the destination, but the journey.”
We need to enjoy the journey so the destination does not disappoint.